I have never been so glad to have the mom I do. Wow Insider’s breakfast topic today dealt with how do you explain WoW to muggles? (Muggles being non-WoW players in this case.)

Several issues were immediately brought up and then rehashed through the comments. I just wanted to take a moment to consider them and talk about what they really mean.

1. People don’t get that it isn’t a single player game.

Several people brought up how they have problems explaining to their parents/friends/significant others that the pretty avatars running around the screen are in fact all being played by other people. The first time I showed my mom WoW, I immediately explained, “You see this guy here, see how his portrait looks? See how his name looks? Okay, see this other guy here, see how his name looks? The first guy, he’s an npc. The second guy, he’s a player.” She then looked around the screen and commented, “But, most of the characters on the screen, they look like players!” I laughed at the surprise in her voice. From that point on, she really grasped that I wasn’t alone in the world.

2. There isn’t a pause button.

When I am not in game, the world keeps on turning.  Players keep logging in and things keep happening, even when I am not there. I can’t pause, because it isn’t a game that relies on my existence. This is where the sports analogy can really take over. To really explain this, most people said things like, “Think about it like the Superbowl. You can’t ask the players to stop playing while you go pee. The game is gonna keep going, you have to pick the best time to run pee. This might be the half-time show. Might be when  player gets injured. Might be when the coaches call a time out.” In WoW, you can’t just press pause and get up to do something. You have to be “safe”. If you are in a battleground, group, raid, etc, you can’t just jump up. You have to wait for half time.

Luckily for me, my mom was used to playing Tetris and understood that even being able to pause the game, when she came back, her flow and mindset for the level was broken and likely would mean restarting. So when she came up to me while playing WoW (or more accurately at the time DAoC) and I said “Sorry mom, busy!” she would say “When you’re in a safe spot, I need you.” And she was cool with that safe spot being 30 minutes or an hour out.

3. The people you are playing with are important and friends.

This is always the point where my husband rolls his eyes and says “Second job…” But my mom always stressed the importance of honoring your commitments, being on time, and being respectful of others and their time. I hate saying I will make a raid and then missing it. People will often respond with, “But it’s just a game.” From the number of comments that other people made, this is a very common issue. Responses to how to explain this generally fall into the sports metaphor. Many commenters likened being a part of a raid team with being a part of a bowling league or team. If you don’t show up to play, no one gets to play.

I show up to raid early, prepared and ready to pull. Nothing annoys me more than players who show up 15 minutes late, without consumables, and goofing off, essentially treating it as if it weren’t important. If it were a single player game, it wouldn’t be. But you have 9 to 24 other people, who deserve respect, waiting on you.

Another thing that came up in the discussion was the implication that these other players aren’t “real”. As if they matter less as people because the major connection with them only exists in a virtual world.  I always consider the fact that a real person, likely much like me, sits behind the avatar in game. But I have had people say things like “Well, your ‘friend’ who may or may not be real.” Chances are I have spoken with these people enough in game that if I call them my friend, I know them well enough to have made that decision. Even more so, chances are they are on my facebook, I have seen pictures of them, or maybe even hung out with them in real life.

4. Yes, it’s a video game… That doesn’t make it any less important to me.

I always love it when people ask me how much I play WoW and I respond with 3-4 hours a night if I head straight home from work, plus 7-8 per weekend day if I can. They are genuinely horrified. Couldn’t that time be spent doing something better?!? I can’t resist laughing. This is the point where I ask: Do you watch TV? Do you watch movies you get on Netflix? Do you play golf? Do you play basketball? Do you hike/bike/swim? Usually the best one they respond with is “Oh of course I watch tv, I watch x show, and x station” etc etc. See the thing is, unless I am playing WoW, I don’t watch tv. WoW is my hobby, just like building boats is Gibbs’ or bowling is Abby’s. Just like my grandpa sat around listening to music and playing his guitar. Just like people who go out and run for an hour every day. Just like people who go and sit at a bar and socialize. The only difference is, I go and socialize with people who live in Canada, New York, Florida, California, and everywhere in between.

I especially like when people are like, you pay 15 bucks a month to play a GAME?!? My retort: You paid how much for those golf clubs and greens fee? You paid how much for that paintball gun? You paid how much for all that camping gear? Football teams spend how much on players???

WoW is no different from any hobby or sport. There are people who get it and people who don’t. To try to explain it, you have to use their words. For most people the sports analogies work pretty well to explain WoW. I am a member of the team. Raids are the games. Dungeons are the practices. The Guild Master or Raid Leader is the coach. My computer is my speed and agility. The internet, my stadium. My guild, my team. In the end, I am the equivalent of a minor league player, who loves the game.